THE HEART of Kowalke Coaching is our individualized relationship coaching. We take good relationships, and we make them better through a clear understanding of what it takes to make relationships great.
We start with theory and getting to know you and your relationship, then we work with you and your partner on developing customized strategies that put good relationship principles into practice. Understanding the dynamics of good relationships is relatively easy—making lasting changes that lead to those extraordinary relationships is what our coaching is all about.
Coaching programs vary in length depending on your goals, but they typically range from one to 12 months. After you’ve reached your goal, you can retain us for periodic relationship guidance or start another round of coaching based of further goals. As with a top athlete, the quality of your relationship is only limited by your commitment to excellence; we can help take your relationship as far as you and your partner are committed to taking it.
Note: We help clients no matter their culture or where they live in the world, although currently our coaching services are only available in the English language.
ApproachEach coaching program is highly individualized and based on relationship goals established by you and your coach. The process consists of four general phases, and we set a specific plan early in the program so there’s accountability and a constant focus on results. We ask that you make a commitment to stick with your relationship growth even when the work is hard, but during the first phase you can cancel at any time if coaching is not right for you.
Here’s the outline of our general approach and why it works.
In the Discovery phase, we build a deep understanding of each other and assess your current relationship capabilities. You learn the fundamentals of good relationships and understand our approach. We learn about you and your partner. Together, we also develop goals for your relationship and set clear metrics for tracking progress.
The first phase helps us assess your current situation and needs, and it lays the foundation of understanding and trust for the coaching relationship. We discover if coaching is right for you, and we develop an individualized plan for success.
The real growth begins in the Training phase. We work closely with you and your partner on individualized relationship exercises that develop the right habits and mindset. We constantly assess and periodically adjust the exercises according to the growth and needs of your particular relationship.
The second phase is where we take the knowledge of you and your partner and use it for relationship growth. We evolve and correct limiting relationship beliefs, and we build new habits that support a truly amazing relationship. Periodically we uncover challenges in the relationship and resolve them as we move through the training program.
With the Integration phase, we expand the coaching to include spot work with other coaches who can lend a slightly different perspective on some of the remaining blockages in your relationship. Our relationship exercises continue, but more of the work is done automatically and independently as you gain in relationship strength and insight.
In the third phase, we refine your relationship with insight from additional members of the Kowalke Coaching family. We also start moving the center of the work to you and your partner so the training gains are lasting.
In the Maintenance phase, active relationship work slows down but we still review periodically to ensure that the gains are lasting and any little blockages in the relationship are cleared. Most of the work during this phase is self-directed, but we’re only a call away when you need help.
The Maintenance phase ensures that your relationship will remain extraordinary and continue to grow even after program completion. You have already developed a deeper understanding of your relationship by this point, and you’ve built healthy new habits. This phase makes sure the goals have been reached by pulling back from the coaching while still monitoring and remaining accessible for hidden challenges.
We offer both individual and couples coaching. If you are single, the choice is obvious. But even if you are in a committed relationship, there are times when individual coaching makes sense.
Two people coming together as one is at the heart of every exceptional relationship. Reaching the deepest level of a relationship therefore requires both partners. If one partner has a weak understanding of relationships and the other has a strong understanding, the relationship will be limited by the partner with the weak understanding.
For those wanting the deepest possible relationship, we strongly recommend couples coaching so both partners are at their best.
There are times when only one half of the relationship is available or feels the need for coaching. While this is not the ideal situation, even one person can make a big difference with good relationship understanding and practices.
The four phases of the relationship coaching program are the same whether working with a couple or an individual, but with Individual Coaching more emphasis is placed on making the best of a partner’s relationship limitations since we cannot directly address those issues in the coaching.
Individual Coaching also is appropriate for singles wanting the skills to make their next relationship the one that lasts.
© 2021 Peter Kowalke
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